December 28, 2004
Stupid criminal carves slur in his own forehead; gets caught
A 22 year-old Independance, MO man has admitted that his hate-crime claim was false.
Floyd Elliott, of Independence, told police that on Dec. 14, two subjects attacked him in the parking lot of his apartment complex. He said the attackers cut him in the stomach, branded him with a hot knife, and attempted to carve the word "Fag" on his forehead.D'oh!Investigators were suspicious about the report because the head carving was backwards, as if done while looking into a mirror.
I don't think that even Homer Simpson could be that dumb.
Just damn.
I think some peoples heads are put on backwards. What an idiot.
Posted by: Rachel Ann at December 28, 2004 02:53 PMI don't know if I am laughing or crying.
Posted by: expatguy at December 28, 2004 09:01 PMBiggest laugh of the day! Thanks, Michael!
Posted by: Pat Curley at December 28, 2004 10:21 PM"Honest, Officer, the bad man was trying to carve GAF into my forehead!" Just damn. If you are trying to hoodwink the public-at-large, it would be worth the 5 extra minutes to think your plan through.
Posted by: skh at December 29, 2004 06:53 PMAn idiot?
Or...
Maybe the assailant had lysdexia.
Didja think o' that?
What a GAF....
Posted by: CrzyDJM at December 30, 2004 01:02 PMI'm reporting this to DAM (mothers against dyslexia).
Did you hear about the dyslexic satanist? He sold his soul to Santa.
Happy New Year!
Posted by: BobG at January 2, 2005 09:19 AM